Direct translation: "I have so many problems."
I'd like to clarify that when I say "problem" I mean bad habits or really weird tendencies. I understand that compared to a lot of people, I really don't have any serious problems. Reality slapped me (hard- it was more of a sucker punch, really) in the face a few weeks ago, and let's just say that I'm really trying hard to be more grateful for the amazing life I have, and am attempting to count my blessings.
All that aside, I've had a bit of a strange day, filled with my weird little habits. Sundays either bring out the best or the worst in me, because as far as days of the week go, they're typically pretty empty and obligation free. So I either get down to business and get shit done, or (more often) I sit around and do weird stuff and then end up scurrying around at 9:39 PM trying to get ready for the upcoming week.
Here is a list I've been mentally compiling, all day, of my strange habits. I'm doing this as a favor to all of you, so that you can take a look at yourself in the mirror and say "Self, we've got it pretty good compared to that certifiably insane Bri." You can thank me later.
1. I always let my dishes pile up in the sink until the sink and surrounding counter area have become a safety hazard. One misstep or wrong move anywhere in the vicinity and the precariously stacked Leaning Tower of Dishes will come crashing down. Yes, this has happened before. WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF?! That IS the question.
2. I do the same thing with my laundry.
3. When I find a new song I like, I listen to that song exclusively for anywhere from 1-4 weeks at a time. I found a new song I liked last night. So yes, I'm listening to it on repeat right now. In case you want to get sucked in to my insanity, the song is "Make You Feel My Love" by Adele. She's British. And awesome. And one of her songs costs $1.29 on iTunes which makes me think she might be a bit of a tool, but I'm willing to withhold judgment until I get the whole story. It better be a good one, Adele.
4. I drink coffee with my dinner semi-frequently. This sometimes makes my daily goal of a 10 PM bed time unattainable. I curse myself for my foolish beverage choice the next morning when I'm bleary eyed and grouchy....but then I just do it again.
5. I've developed an addiction to pineapple juice, and it's all I want to drink. This wouldn't be so bad, if I didn't also have frequent heartburn. I think it's genetic because my dad and brother take some sort of intense medication for theirs. None of the women in my family have it.....I wonder if I have too much testosterone....although, the size of my, shall we say, decolletage would refute that whole theory. Anyway, I'm in the midst of a passionate pineapple juice love affair. I can't be bothered to use a glass either, and the juice carton is very strangely shaped, so I keep dribbling on myself. But I keep doing it. I'm starting to see a pattern here.....
6. I do the same thing with TV shows that I do with new songs. When I find one I like, I become obsessed for awhile. I'm currently obsessed with Flight of the Conchords. Bret and Jemaine are so sassy, I can't seem to get enough.
7. I always think there's some sort of supernatural shenanigans being played on me when really normal things happen. I was about to fall asleep for my second nap of the day today, and my half open balcony door SLAMMED shut in a light breeze. I jumped, yelped, and was immediately convinced some type of spirits or other forces were trying to send me a message. The only message I could come up with was "Don't take another nap." I chose to ignore said message and went to sleep anyway, after firmly closing and locking the offending door.
8. I like to go for walks. This is perfectly normal. While on my walks, I like to look into any open or lighted windows, check out what's going on inside, and make up stories about what I IMAGINE is really going on inside. This, I think, is not normal.
9. I really enjoy putting my name inside all of my books, and then sorting them into their proper places on my bookshelves. And then re-sorting them following a new organizational system. They're currently sorted by genre, and book height within each genre.
10. I enjoy sitting back and admiring my bookshelf after it's been sorted to my satisfaction.
So there you have it folks. I've got problems. I'd like to think they're more quirks than problems though. Now I'm off to drink some more pineapple juice and tackle the minefield of dishes awaiting me in my miniature sink.
I hope you all have tiny problems like these to fill up your days, and don't have any bigger or scarier ones to worry about.
Cheerio.
