Just call me Macgyver. I have conquered the unbalanced washing machine, and it was a sweet, sweet victory. For the past couple of months, every time I do laundry my machine jumps and rattles like a badly maintained twin engine plane attempting to take off on a very bumpy runway. It's quite possibly the most jarring sound I've ever heard (well, maybe number two to my door buzzer), and for the life of me I couldn't figure out WHY the machine was pulling these shenanigans. The absolute worst part of this situation was during the spin cycle- I honestly thought the tile floor underneath the machine was going to crack. I'll confess that I've hefted myself up to sit on top of it, more than once, in order to suppress the jumping and shaking. Given that I don't have a dryer, the extra-long spin cycle is essential in keeping the drying time to a minimum. So, wocka wocka wocka, I explain all of this so that you can understand my feelings of triumph when I FIXED IT TODAY. All by myself! The jumping and shaking was hardly evident, and the machine was virtually SILENT. I just stood in the kitchen (yes, my washing machine is in the kitchen, it's another flaw in this apartment and reason I want to move) for a few minutes, staring at the machine and enjoying the little whirring sound it made. I can neither confirm nor deny that I muttered "Take THAT!" to an inanimate object.
I bet the people that live below me are even happier about this than I am.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Saturday, January 16, 2010
I'm a Pro
I know I don't have to say it, since everyone already knows. But- I am. A pro, that is.
Do not dispute me! The truth lies in the name of my NEW LAPTOP....MacBook PRO. Obviously used by professionals, and professionals only.
The area of my professionalism has yet to be determined...teaching? My level of professionalism is debatable, considering the fact that I mutter "jerks" under my breath when my kids are annoying me. Essentially, I'm extremely excited to have this new piece of machinery at my disposal. Here's to hoping that this piece lasts longer than others in my home, as NO ONE wants to re-live (hyphen or no hyphen?!) the iPod falling in the toilet crisis of 2008.
The one problem is that I can't figure out what to do in place of the "right click" option that my good old PC offered. I'm a right click fanatic, so it's been a bit rough. If any Mac users out there have some advice, I'm all ears.
In other news, Christmas break came and went much too fast, and I loved having my sister here, even if she did hate London. I love her enough to forgive her for that. I'll admit to being slightly mopey after she left Dresden to go party with her friends for a couple more weeks, leaving me here having to return to work in a few days. I can also neither confirm nor deny that my Christmas tree is still up in the corner of my living room, due to the overwhelming melancholy I feel at the thought of taking it down by myself. Oh, it's a fake tree. That's why it's still standing and hasn't spontaneously combusted already. I've decided that tomorrow is the day though. It has to be done- I'd be more than slightly embarrassed if someone stopped by in mid January and my tree was still up in all it's glory. And yes, it is glorious.
Dresden is a snowy wasteland these days. I'm seriously considering investing in a dogsled along with a pair of matching Huskies as my means of transportation. I've never been exposed to THIS much snow for such an extended period of time, and I'm starting to understand why my dear friend Kristin Ourada always referred to it as "white poison."
What do you know, it's 2:28 AM. How time flies when you're fiddling around on your new computer. I do believe that's my cue to hit the sack.
Tschussie.
Do not dispute me! The truth lies in the name of my NEW LAPTOP....MacBook PRO. Obviously used by professionals, and professionals only.
The area of my professionalism has yet to be determined...teaching? My level of professionalism is debatable, considering the fact that I mutter "jerks" under my breath when my kids are annoying me. Essentially, I'm extremely excited to have this new piece of machinery at my disposal. Here's to hoping that this piece lasts longer than others in my home, as NO ONE wants to re-live (hyphen or no hyphen?!) the iPod falling in the toilet crisis of 2008.
The one problem is that I can't figure out what to do in place of the "right click" option that my good old PC offered. I'm a right click fanatic, so it's been a bit rough. If any Mac users out there have some advice, I'm all ears.
In other news, Christmas break came and went much too fast, and I loved having my sister here, even if she did hate London. I love her enough to forgive her for that. I'll admit to being slightly mopey after she left Dresden to go party with her friends for a couple more weeks, leaving me here having to return to work in a few days. I can also neither confirm nor deny that my Christmas tree is still up in the corner of my living room, due to the overwhelming melancholy I feel at the thought of taking it down by myself. Oh, it's a fake tree. That's why it's still standing and hasn't spontaneously combusted already. I've decided that tomorrow is the day though. It has to be done- I'd be more than slightly embarrassed if someone stopped by in mid January and my tree was still up in all it's glory. And yes, it is glorious.
Dresden is a snowy wasteland these days. I'm seriously considering investing in a dogsled along with a pair of matching Huskies as my means of transportation. I've never been exposed to THIS much snow for such an extended period of time, and I'm starting to understand why my dear friend Kristin Ourada always referred to it as "white poison."
What do you know, it's 2:28 AM. How time flies when you're fiddling around on your new computer. I do believe that's my cue to hit the sack.
Tschussie.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Going Postal
An adorable, bespectacled elderly man, who works at the post office down the street from my apartment, has singlehandedly restored my faith in the friendliness of Germans.
To start with, he was considerate enough to ask me if the DHL boxes I was purchasing were for posting within Germany- since these particular ones couldn't be sent internationally. I gratefully replied that I was in fact attempting to purchase international boxes, and he then scurried to the back room and returned with two international packages. Then, instead of just selling them to me and waving the next customer over (which I expected him to do, since there was an epically long line behind me), he inquired as to where I would be sending them. Mind you, he picked up on the fact that my German wasn't from 'round these parts, and I noticed that he spoke much more slowly and clearly after the first couple of sentences that came out of my mouth. He didn't do it in a demeaning way though, the way so many people do without even realizing. He was obviously just trying to make sure I understood him, which made the whole interaction much more pleasant, especially on my end. So, I told him that one was going to the USA and one was going to Afghanistan. "Ach, Afghanistan!" He said with raised eyebrows. I nodded and tried to explain "Meinen Bruder ist einen Soldat, und er wohnt jetzt in Afghanistan." My brother is a soldier, and currently lives in Afghanistan. Not grammatically correct at all, really, and a little (ok, a lot) on the basic side. But, he smiled and said something along the lines of "Well, you're such a nice sister to send him a package. It must be for Christmas?" I nodded, and he then proceeded to write up a detailed list of how much it would cost me to send a package there, depending on how much it weighed. After that, he wrote me a few little notes on the back of the paper on what I should say to the person when I came back, depending on if I wanted to send it priority or not, and explained in detail how to fill out the customs slip. Finally, I paid, stuffed everything into my bag, and waved goodbye, thanking him profusely. As I left he said "Ich hoeffe deinen Bruder gesund und munter bleibt." I hope your brother stays safe and sound.
It was maybe a seven minute interaction, but I just can't stop thinking about how friendly this man was, in so many small ways. Not only was it more wonderful than I can say to understand EVERYTHING someone said to me witouth having to infer meaning while frantically trying to keep pace with them, it was great to encounter a person who really was just trying to help me and make my day a little better. He could have shooed me off after selling me the wrong boxes, or glowered at me when I spoke hestitantly in German- but he didn't. It's nice to know that there are some truly genuine and caring people left out there. This stranger was a tiny part of my day, but I'll remember him for a long time.
In completely unrelated news, I am obsessed with the new Lady Gaga song/video "Bad Romance." I honestly, honestly don't know why. I just can't seem to stop watching it, even though as my sister said when I convinced her to check it out, "It's pretty effing weird, and what's up with that hairless cat?"
I don't know! But I can't seem to get enough. So I'm foisting it on you fools! Buahaha. Enjoy.
To start with, he was considerate enough to ask me if the DHL boxes I was purchasing were for posting within Germany- since these particular ones couldn't be sent internationally. I gratefully replied that I was in fact attempting to purchase international boxes, and he then scurried to the back room and returned with two international packages. Then, instead of just selling them to me and waving the next customer over (which I expected him to do, since there was an epically long line behind me), he inquired as to where I would be sending them. Mind you, he picked up on the fact that my German wasn't from 'round these parts, and I noticed that he spoke much more slowly and clearly after the first couple of sentences that came out of my mouth. He didn't do it in a demeaning way though, the way so many people do without even realizing. He was obviously just trying to make sure I understood him, which made the whole interaction much more pleasant, especially on my end. So, I told him that one was going to the USA and one was going to Afghanistan. "Ach, Afghanistan!" He said with raised eyebrows. I nodded and tried to explain "Meinen Bruder ist einen Soldat, und er wohnt jetzt in Afghanistan." My brother is a soldier, and currently lives in Afghanistan. Not grammatically correct at all, really, and a little (ok, a lot) on the basic side. But, he smiled and said something along the lines of "Well, you're such a nice sister to send him a package. It must be for Christmas?" I nodded, and he then proceeded to write up a detailed list of how much it would cost me to send a package there, depending on how much it weighed. After that, he wrote me a few little notes on the back of the paper on what I should say to the person when I came back, depending on if I wanted to send it priority or not, and explained in detail how to fill out the customs slip. Finally, I paid, stuffed everything into my bag, and waved goodbye, thanking him profusely. As I left he said "Ich hoeffe deinen Bruder gesund und munter bleibt." I hope your brother stays safe and sound.
It was maybe a seven minute interaction, but I just can't stop thinking about how friendly this man was, in so many small ways. Not only was it more wonderful than I can say to understand EVERYTHING someone said to me witouth having to infer meaning while frantically trying to keep pace with them, it was great to encounter a person who really was just trying to help me and make my day a little better. He could have shooed me off after selling me the wrong boxes, or glowered at me when I spoke hestitantly in German- but he didn't. It's nice to know that there are some truly genuine and caring people left out there. This stranger was a tiny part of my day, but I'll remember him for a long time.
In completely unrelated news, I am obsessed with the new Lady Gaga song/video "Bad Romance." I honestly, honestly don't know why. I just can't seem to stop watching it, even though as my sister said when I convinced her to check it out, "It's pretty effing weird, and what's up with that hairless cat?"
I don't know! But I can't seem to get enough. So I'm foisting it on you fools! Buahaha. Enjoy.
Friday, December 4, 2009
The Makings of a Great Day
I bought a new hat today, and I'm quite enamored with it. Partially because it keeps me warm(er) in this frigid weather, and partially because it is just so stylish. Like me.
All the stores were playing Christmas music today! This warms my heart.
I'm watching The Office right now, and Michael Scott just killed the dreams of fifteen children. I love it.
My attempt to give up diet soda lasted exactly eight days. The upside: I am currently enjoying a crisp, ice cold diet Pepsi and it is delicious and delightful.
I heard via a RIDICULOUS and incredibly annoying amount of almost identical facebook updates that the Ducks won the Civil War. To be honest, I'm more annoyed about this bombardment of idiotic status updates than I am about them actually winning. Sorry Dad and Trevor. There's always next year.
Oops, I was trying to only write happy things in this post. Well, I guess if you're an Oregon fan that is a happy thing, so I'll let it slide.
The lens cleaning spray that the charming salesman at LensCrafters in Salem, Oregon convinced me to buy back in July works like a DREAM. This might not seem like something to get worked up about, but having smudgy glasses makes me want to scream and punch a baby. Thus, me having sparkling clean glasses not only makes me deliriously happy, but saves lots of babies from being punched. In their baby faces.
I can sleep until I decide to wake up tomorrow, because tomorrow is SATURDAY.
I hope this balances out my last post, which I admit was kind of depressing. Don't worry, that kid and I are moving onward and upward. To make the end of the week even better, one of my students left me a note on the whiteboard at the end of school today. It said "Miss Bri, I love you!" and while I was charmed by the sentiment, I did a fist pump in my empty classroom because she punctuated it correctly.
Now I'm on to 30 Rock and I just can't stop chuckling. Whoever came up with the idea of streaming TV shows online deserves a really big cookie.
Here's to the weekend, and two more weeks until Christmas break!
All the stores were playing Christmas music today! This warms my heart.
I'm watching The Office right now, and Michael Scott just killed the dreams of fifteen children. I love it.
My attempt to give up diet soda lasted exactly eight days. The upside: I am currently enjoying a crisp, ice cold diet Pepsi and it is delicious and delightful.
I heard via a RIDICULOUS and incredibly annoying amount of almost identical facebook updates that the Ducks won the Civil War. To be honest, I'm more annoyed about this bombardment of idiotic status updates than I am about them actually winning. Sorry Dad and Trevor. There's always next year.
Oops, I was trying to only write happy things in this post. Well, I guess if you're an Oregon fan that is a happy thing, so I'll let it slide.
The lens cleaning spray that the charming salesman at LensCrafters in Salem, Oregon convinced me to buy back in July works like a DREAM. This might not seem like something to get worked up about, but having smudgy glasses makes me want to scream and punch a baby. Thus, me having sparkling clean glasses not only makes me deliriously happy, but saves lots of babies from being punched. In their baby faces.
I can sleep until I decide to wake up tomorrow, because tomorrow is SATURDAY.
I hope this balances out my last post, which I admit was kind of depressing. Don't worry, that kid and I are moving onward and upward. To make the end of the week even better, one of my students left me a note on the whiteboard at the end of school today. It said "Miss Bri, I love you!" and while I was charmed by the sentiment, I did a fist pump in my empty classroom because she punctuated it correctly.
Now I'm on to 30 Rock and I just can't stop chuckling. Whoever came up with the idea of streaming TV shows online deserves a really big cookie.
Here's to the weekend, and two more weeks until Christmas break!
Monday, November 30, 2009
For Mom
So, my mom has promised me she'll read my blog. I am holding her to that promise by posting pictures she wants to see ONLY HERE! Muahahaaaaa.
Thanksgiving in Dresden was fantastic! Even with all the non-Americans who wandered in off the street (ok...we invited them), it was still a great night of delicious food, delicious wine, wonderful company, and of course....gambling. No event hosted by my dear friends, the Spaldings, would be complete without it. You'll be happy to know that I was the victor of ALL gambling activities of the evening, coming out eighty euros richer.
PSYCH! I lost it all. It all being ten euros, but I'm not independently wealthy people. And like Kenny Rogers says, you gotta know when to hold em', know when to fold em', know when to walk awaaaaaaaaay, know when to ruuuuun...well, maybe that's not really applicable considering we didn't play cards, and that I didn't, in fact, know when to walk away.
Also of note: I made a sweet potato dish (with the close guidance of my cooking sensei, Anne Kalos) that people actually, without prompting, said was DELICIOUS. Their words, not mine! It would seem things are looking up on the domestic front.
It was a fantastic night, and made me proud to be one of the 'Muricans in Dresden. Enjoy the pictures mom!
Getting ready to start the night's festivities with a
racing sort of game I don't know the name of.
Before you start, you place up to 3 euros on any of
the little characters. Then you want your little
character to stay on the table the longest. It's
far more exciting than it seems.
In the midst of it. I was still going strong with my
two bets, on the Cubs babushka doll and the Swedish
horse.
But alas, the Hawaiian Hula Bitch was the winner.
Roy getting ready to manhandle the enormous
bird.
Obviously the most attractive table in the room.
Dinner table 2.
Dinner table 3.
After dinner we played a few rounds of left, right,
center, the ultimate dice game for any low stakes
gambler.
The suspense continues as the dice roll, and euro
coins fly across the table.
An after dinner shot of....something we found in
the fridge.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Christmas is Coming, the Goose is Getting Fat....
The holiday season is in FULL swing here in Dresden, it's almost ridiculous how Christmas-y everything is. This is coming from a girl who has a deep love for all things Christmas (and Hannukah) related. I think the problem is that they start so damn early! In the US we have the Thanksgiving barrier to keep things from getting too merry too fast. Here there's obviously no Thanksgiving, so the DAY AFTER Halloween, all the Christmas stuff comes out in the stores. Then, about the second week of November, all the Christmas decorations go up around the city. THEN, last weekend the Christmas markets opened. All before Thanksgiving! Come on people, everything in moderation. Three months of Christmas is a bit much.
However now that Thanksgiving is over, and I celebrated it in style with my Dresden family, I've allowed myself to be sucked into the onslaught of joy and Yueltide cheer. I went downtown today and meandered through a mini Wheinachtsmarkt (I'm no genius when it comes to spelling German words, ok?) , and picked up a present to send to some of the relations back home. I also put out all my Christmas decorations, which total the whopping number of three. I need to do some decor shopping this week, and figure out where and how to procure a Christmas tree. Since I'm staying here for Christmas this year, I plan to celebrate in the style to which I've become accustomed. I'm also fully expecting my sister to contribute her baking skills once she's arrived.
All of this being said, I do feel a little sad and melancholy at the thought of not being in Oregon for the holidays. I enjoy the life I have here, and love my friends (who, as my friend Roy said in his Thanksgiving toast, do feel like more of an extended family). But I still miss my family and dear friends back in the US. The thought of being without them on Christmas makes me miss them a little more than usual.
So! A homage, through photos, to the people I'm missing, and wishing were here with me. Happy almost December!
Disclaimer: These are in NO particular order, as I seem to have no control whatsoever over the editing functions of this piece of junk.
My mom and dad! Seen here gettin' down with
their bad selves on New Year's Eve a couple of
years ago.
The littlest sister of them all, Bridgy.
Kristin Ourada, best friend from forever.
This is the first time I've ever
conceded to spelling her name like that.
Anna Walters, my partner in so many capers,
adventures, and inebriated McDonald's runs. We
manage to cause trouble no matter which continent
we're on.
My older brother, Trevor. He's certifiably
awesome and I love spending time with him...
it's hard to believe we used to physically abuse
each other on a regular basis.
Dear friend and fellow lover of all (ok, many) things
nerdy, Jeff Hammond. We've been friends for...FOUR
years now, and this is honestly the only picture I have
that has both of us in it.
THE BEST GRANDPA EVER. Otherwise
known as Papa. He really is the best. Do not dispute
me.
My everything but the DNA siblings: Dave and
Emily.
My one and only Court-dawg. We slept together in
EVERY bed in her old house, including the trundle
beds. I miss sleeping with her. Take that as you will...
Vanessa Hargett, OLDEST friend. We're talking
17 YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP people.
Ali, Mo and Sarah...oh, so many wonderful times
we've had together. They are lovers of my early
morning toy trumpet serenades, and I know they
really wish they could have me back just to perform
that service for them.
What better way to end an already ridiculously sappy post, than with a photo of my entire family in MATCHING SHIRTS!? I enjoy the kitsch value of this picture, and also appreciate the fact that we were all in the same time at the same place. However, I do NOT understand why no one alerted me to the extremely masculine fashion in which I am sitting. Seriously, my brother and I are posed in the same exact way.
I guess you can't win em' all.
However now that Thanksgiving is over, and I celebrated it in style with my Dresden family, I've allowed myself to be sucked into the onslaught of joy and Yueltide cheer. I went downtown today and meandered through a mini Wheinachtsmarkt (I'm no genius when it comes to spelling German words, ok?) , and picked up a present to send to some of the relations back home. I also put out all my Christmas decorations, which total the whopping number of three. I need to do some decor shopping this week, and figure out where and how to procure a Christmas tree. Since I'm staying here for Christmas this year, I plan to celebrate in the style to which I've become accustomed. I'm also fully expecting my sister to contribute her baking skills once she's arrived.
All of this being said, I do feel a little sad and melancholy at the thought of not being in Oregon for the holidays. I enjoy the life I have here, and love my friends (who, as my friend Roy said in his Thanksgiving toast, do feel like more of an extended family). But I still miss my family and dear friends back in the US. The thought of being without them on Christmas makes me miss them a little more than usual.
So! A homage, through photos, to the people I'm missing, and wishing were here with me. Happy almost December!
Disclaimer: These are in NO particular order, as I seem to have no control whatsoever over the editing functions of this piece of junk.
My mom and dad! Seen here gettin' down with
their bad selves on New Year's Eve a couple of
years ago.
The littlest sister of them all, Bridgy.
Kristin Ourada, best friend from forever.
This is the first time I've ever
conceded to spelling her name like that.
Anna Walters, my partner in so many capers,
adventures, and inebriated McDonald's runs. We
manage to cause trouble no matter which continent
we're on.
My older brother, Trevor. He's certifiably
awesome and I love spending time with him...
it's hard to believe we used to physically abuse
each other on a regular basis.
Dear friend and fellow lover of all (ok, many) things
nerdy, Jeff Hammond. We've been friends for...FOUR
years now, and this is honestly the only picture I have
that has both of us in it.
THE BEST GRANDPA EVER. Otherwise
known as Papa. He really is the best. Do not dispute
me.
My everything but the DNA siblings: Dave and
Emily.
My one and only Court-dawg. We slept together in
EVERY bed in her old house, including the trundle
beds. I miss sleeping with her. Take that as you will...
Vanessa Hargett, OLDEST friend. We're talking
17 YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP people.
Ali, Mo and Sarah...oh, so many wonderful times
we've had together. They are lovers of my early
morning toy trumpet serenades, and I know they
really wish they could have me back just to perform
that service for them.
What better way to end an already ridiculously sappy post, than with a photo of my entire family in MATCHING SHIRTS!? I enjoy the kitsch value of this picture, and also appreciate the fact that we were all in the same time at the same place. However, I do NOT understand why no one alerted me to the extremely masculine fashion in which I am sitting. Seriously, my brother and I are posed in the same exact way.
I guess you can't win em' all.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Fight the Squirrel
I am most definitely updating my blog that nobody reads as a means of avoiding writing my report cards. Someone just TRY to stop me! Buaaaahahahaha!!
I can also neither confirm nor deny that I had an el gigantico (you didn't know this, but I'm fluent in Spanish) STARBUCKS latte around lunch time, and that it has done two things. Thing the first: vastly improved my mood. Thing the second: hyped me up to a near record level of Sunday evening energy. It's like I snorted a line of coke and then drank seven red bulls. Now, I've never actually done either of those things, but I have an excellent (some might say highly overactive) imagination, so I can imagine how one might feel if one HAD snorted a line of coke and washed it down with seven red bulls. And that's how I feel! Am I channeling this amazing energy to get lots of great report card writing done?! HAH. I laugh in that idea's general direction.
I do my best work under pressure- this has been proven time and again throughout my life. Most notably, in my junior and senior years of college, when the baristas at both Coffee Time and the 24 hour Starbucks in Portland and I were on a first name basis. I pulled so many all nighters my junior year, it ceased to be any sort of abnormal event- my housemates were amazed when I DIDN'T have to spend Thursday night holed up in the corner of some coffee shop, frantically typing out papers and journal entries until 5 AM. And guess what suckers? I got straight A's that year, WHILE taking 22 credits a semester! I feel this is empirical evidence of my ability to get shit done in a limited amount of time.
Did I also mention that I'm a master of rationalization?
Some notable events have taken (I first wrote "have been taking place" and then I had a flashback to Ms. Mclean attacking my DRAG paper's to be verbs with a bright yellow highlighter my sophomore year of high school. So then I changed it. This was an incredibly long parenthetical aside.) place in my life recently, as well as in the Caldwell Family in general. I'll give first billing to the most exciting and shout it from the rooftops-esque of said events:
My brother, Trevor Ryan Caldwell (known aliases include Douche Puppet, Hamster Man, and Dr. Bones) IS GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!
Folks who know my broski will understand my excitment. His fiancee Maureen is AWESOME, and an excellent addition to my already unique family. I hope she knows what she's getting herself into......
Compared to this piece of news, nothing else I've been up to lately is really worth getting too jazzed up about. I decided to go with "jazzed" there, rather than "excited" because I'm currently listening to the new Michael Buble CD, and if I had to choose one word to describe it, jazzy would be the one. I'm also listening at top volume, so I hope my neighbors have as deep an affection for Buble as I do.
This post is full of really strange comments. Like that one.
But really, where was I? Oh yes, interesting-ish events.
I just finished planning a six day trip to the city of all cities- LONDON. I'm heading there with my extremely likable and fun to spend time with sister Katy over Christmas break. Got the plane tickets, the lodging, even the bus tickets to and from Berlin! We're flying out from there, because it costs about twice as much to go anywhere from Dresden as it does from Berlin. Lame Dresden, lame. I'm ridiculously excited for this trip, mostly because I'm going with Katy, and we have very similar interests, so there won't be any (well, perhaps I should say minimal amounts of) arguing about where we're going or what we're doing. I've also been to London three times already, but two on two of those occasions I was by myself, so I feel there are many pubs I have yet to explore. I don't really go out pubbing (it's like clubbing, only nerdier and way BETTER) on my own very often.
Also coming up is Christmas itself, which should be enjoyable, even if I won't be at home. Katy will be here, we'll have a little tree, watch some Christmas classics (Home Alone is first on the list), and then go to some friends' for dinner on Christmas day. As long as the musical phenomenon Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer is played at some point throughout the festivities, I think we'll both be filled with Yueltide cheer.
My class loves Dave Matthews! I knew there was a reason I went into this education business. It's difficult to describe how joyous I felt when I put the CD on in class on Friday afternoon, and five minutes later kids were jamming in their seats, and telling me how "awesome" the music was. I also taught them that word. I'm sure their strict German parents are really appreciative of me teaching them proper and polite English. I've only ever played quiet music in class before- things like Pink Martini (their calmer stuff), lots of Brahms and Beethoven, acoustic guitar, etc. But boy, DMB was a hit. They've already elicited a promise from me that I would play it again on Monday. Those kids are so tricky.
This next item is more interesting in a "well shit, what can you do" sort of way. I think there's a family that has decided I'm the devil incarnate, and that I'm slowly turning their daughter into one of my minions of darkness. The dad, and now I think the mom as well, of one of my students seem to just have it out for me. I can't really tell you why. I work REALLY HARD. I try to be the best teacher possible. I treat their daughter with respect and differentiate instruction as much as I can to make sure she's being challenged. But the dad likes to come to parent/teacher meetings and do things like yell, scream, lean across the table in a very threatening manner. When he's not doing any of these things, he manages to be insanely patronizing, never failing to mention my age, my sex, and my "lack of experience." I've imagined about twelve BILLION ways to TAKE HIM DOWN, all of them completely outrageous, intensely satisfying, and probably not things I should be thinking about a parent. However, I feel he has brought my negative feelings upon himself. AND NOW the mom is against me. I was out sick for three days last week (and I was really sick, there was no getting around it), and while I was gone the substitute collected the kids' permission slips for a field trip we are going on tomorrow. She put what I thought was all of them on my desk, carefully and thoughtfully labeled with a sticky note. Well, this particular child's permission slip was missing from the pile she collected, so I sent another one home with her and wrote a little note on it saying that there had been a substitute, and she hadn't received said student's slip. I then very politely requested that a parent sign it and return it the next day. Well. It came back the next day, accompanied by an EXTREMELY rude note. It was written all in German (which I feel is another underhanded way for them to try and slight me, because they don't know that I speak a passable amount of German.) and basically said "I ALREADY SENT THIS TO SCHOOL!!!!!" Yes, it actually included the five exclamation marks.
I've decided these people can go....fly a kite. Nothing I do is good enough for them, and they seem to think I'm the escaped village idiot who somehow faked a university diploma and teaching credentials. Well, joke's on them, because them shit's is REAL!
Sorry for the crassness. It felt appropriate given the subject matter.
I'm trying to be more positive about my job, as well as life in general. Thus my attempt to deal with the biggest thorn in my side these days with a little bit of humor. I've been in a bit of a funk the past couple of weeks, for a lot of reasons, most of them work related. I've also been feeling kind of homesick, possibly due to the fact that I'll be missing out on a gen-u-ine Caldwell 'Muricahn Christmas this year. But life is only as good as you make it, right? I think the key to happiness is just not letting the jerks get you down.
Another reason I'm feeling positive about life: my box of Fitness Clusters breakfast cereal has a picture of a bad ass looking squirrel on it, and his eyes are narrowed in a very threatening manner....oh, and he's wearing giant boxing gloves . Below the picture it says: "DU VS. HORNCHEN- Fight for your Fruhstuck!" German food packaging often includes a bizarre mix of German and English words, this box of cereal being no exception. It means "You vs. Squirrel: fight for your breakfast!" I've been eating this cereal every morning for a week straight, just so I can chortle at that picture when I stumble into the dark kitchen at an ungodly hour of the day. I've eaten all the cereal now, but I saved the box so that once I get around to charging my camera battery, I can take a picture of the fightin' Sciuridae. (According to Websters Dictionary, this is the particular branch of the rodent family that squirrels belong to.)
I think I may have exhausted all topics of any sort of interest. Oh no, one more.
I watched a FANTASTIC movie on Friday night- Inglourious Basterds. I have to admit, I'm not a huge Tarantino fan. I generally dislike gratuitous violence, and his films tend to contain a lot of it. I found that this one only had minimal amounts though, which made it much more enjoyable, in my humble opinion. I loved the way all the different elements of the plot came together in the end, and I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. I also really got a kick out of being able to understand a lot of the German WITHOUT the assitance of subtitles. Ok, I might have peeked at a few of them, but I understood a lot of it- not too bad for the ol' ego. The icing on the cake was definitely Brad Pitt's accent, as well as the incredibly short appearance by Mike Meyers as a British officer. I've never understood people's obsession with Tarantino, but if all his movies were as fantastic as this one, I think I'd jump on that bandwagon pretty quickly.
I'll post a few pictures below, of recent happenings- just in case anyone reads this and doesn't have Facebook. Haha, look at me, acting as if I have a devoted readership. I do know how to make a joke. And with that, I'm out like an irish stout. Report cards, here I come! (Maybe.)
Katy came to visit! We had a great time, and I introduced her to Dresden's finest Weissbier.
My friend Chris had a slammin' Halloween party. Anne was a vampire (they're so hot right now), and I was Pippi Longstocking....I have trouble coming up with costumes.
I t think Pippi drank one too many G&T's.
My friend Lyn didn't want her fetus to miss out on the fun.
Ok, so this photograph is not recent at all, but I just found it and think it's hilarious. My sister Bridget and I are CLASSY brauds.
I can also neither confirm nor deny that I had an el gigantico (you didn't know this, but I'm fluent in Spanish) STARBUCKS latte around lunch time, and that it has done two things. Thing the first: vastly improved my mood. Thing the second: hyped me up to a near record level of Sunday evening energy. It's like I snorted a line of coke and then drank seven red bulls. Now, I've never actually done either of those things, but I have an excellent (some might say highly overactive) imagination, so I can imagine how one might feel if one HAD snorted a line of coke and washed it down with seven red bulls. And that's how I feel! Am I channeling this amazing energy to get lots of great report card writing done?! HAH. I laugh in that idea's general direction.
I do my best work under pressure- this has been proven time and again throughout my life. Most notably, in my junior and senior years of college, when the baristas at both Coffee Time and the 24 hour Starbucks in Portland and I were on a first name basis. I pulled so many all nighters my junior year, it ceased to be any sort of abnormal event- my housemates were amazed when I DIDN'T have to spend Thursday night holed up in the corner of some coffee shop, frantically typing out papers and journal entries until 5 AM. And guess what suckers? I got straight A's that year, WHILE taking 22 credits a semester! I feel this is empirical evidence of my ability to get shit done in a limited amount of time.
Did I also mention that I'm a master of rationalization?
Some notable events have taken (I first wrote "have been taking place" and then I had a flashback to Ms. Mclean attacking my DRAG paper's to be verbs with a bright yellow highlighter my sophomore year of high school. So then I changed it. This was an incredibly long parenthetical aside.) place in my life recently, as well as in the Caldwell Family in general. I'll give first billing to the most exciting and shout it from the rooftops-esque of said events:
My brother, Trevor Ryan Caldwell (known aliases include Douche Puppet, Hamster Man, and Dr. Bones) IS GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!
Folks who know my broski will understand my excitment. His fiancee Maureen is AWESOME, and an excellent addition to my already unique family. I hope she knows what she's getting herself into......
Compared to this piece of news, nothing else I've been up to lately is really worth getting too jazzed up about. I decided to go with "jazzed" there, rather than "excited" because I'm currently listening to the new Michael Buble CD, and if I had to choose one word to describe it, jazzy would be the one. I'm also listening at top volume, so I hope my neighbors have as deep an affection for Buble as I do.
This post is full of really strange comments. Like that one.
But really, where was I? Oh yes, interesting-ish events.
I just finished planning a six day trip to the city of all cities- LONDON. I'm heading there with my extremely likable and fun to spend time with sister Katy over Christmas break. Got the plane tickets, the lodging, even the bus tickets to and from Berlin! We're flying out from there, because it costs about twice as much to go anywhere from Dresden as it does from Berlin. Lame Dresden, lame. I'm ridiculously excited for this trip, mostly because I'm going with Katy, and we have very similar interests, so there won't be any (well, perhaps I should say minimal amounts of) arguing about where we're going or what we're doing. I've also been to London three times already, but two on two of those occasions I was by myself, so I feel there are many pubs I have yet to explore. I don't really go out pubbing (it's like clubbing, only nerdier and way BETTER) on my own very often.
Also coming up is Christmas itself, which should be enjoyable, even if I won't be at home. Katy will be here, we'll have a little tree, watch some Christmas classics (Home Alone is first on the list), and then go to some friends' for dinner on Christmas day. As long as the musical phenomenon Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer is played at some point throughout the festivities, I think we'll both be filled with Yueltide cheer.
My class loves Dave Matthews! I knew there was a reason I went into this education business. It's difficult to describe how joyous I felt when I put the CD on in class on Friday afternoon, and five minutes later kids were jamming in their seats, and telling me how "awesome" the music was. I also taught them that word. I'm sure their strict German parents are really appreciative of me teaching them proper and polite English. I've only ever played quiet music in class before- things like Pink Martini (their calmer stuff), lots of Brahms and Beethoven, acoustic guitar, etc. But boy, DMB was a hit. They've already elicited a promise from me that I would play it again on Monday. Those kids are so tricky.
This next item is more interesting in a "well shit, what can you do" sort of way. I think there's a family that has decided I'm the devil incarnate, and that I'm slowly turning their daughter into one of my minions of darkness. The dad, and now I think the mom as well, of one of my students seem to just have it out for me. I can't really tell you why. I work REALLY HARD. I try to be the best teacher possible. I treat their daughter with respect and differentiate instruction as much as I can to make sure she's being challenged. But the dad likes to come to parent/teacher meetings and do things like yell, scream, lean across the table in a very threatening manner. When he's not doing any of these things, he manages to be insanely patronizing, never failing to mention my age, my sex, and my "lack of experience." I've imagined about twelve BILLION ways to TAKE HIM DOWN, all of them completely outrageous, intensely satisfying, and probably not things I should be thinking about a parent. However, I feel he has brought my negative feelings upon himself. AND NOW the mom is against me. I was out sick for three days last week (and I was really sick, there was no getting around it), and while I was gone the substitute collected the kids' permission slips for a field trip we are going on tomorrow. She put what I thought was all of them on my desk, carefully and thoughtfully labeled with a sticky note. Well, this particular child's permission slip was missing from the pile she collected, so I sent another one home with her and wrote a little note on it saying that there had been a substitute, and she hadn't received said student's slip. I then very politely requested that a parent sign it and return it the next day. Well. It came back the next day, accompanied by an EXTREMELY rude note. It was written all in German (which I feel is another underhanded way for them to try and slight me, because they don't know that I speak a passable amount of German.) and basically said "I ALREADY SENT THIS TO SCHOOL!!!!!" Yes, it actually included the five exclamation marks.
I've decided these people can go....fly a kite. Nothing I do is good enough for them, and they seem to think I'm the escaped village idiot who somehow faked a university diploma and teaching credentials. Well, joke's on them, because them shit's is REAL!
Sorry for the crassness. It felt appropriate given the subject matter.
I'm trying to be more positive about my job, as well as life in general. Thus my attempt to deal with the biggest thorn in my side these days with a little bit of humor. I've been in a bit of a funk the past couple of weeks, for a lot of reasons, most of them work related. I've also been feeling kind of homesick, possibly due to the fact that I'll be missing out on a gen-u-ine Caldwell 'Muricahn Christmas this year. But life is only as good as you make it, right? I think the key to happiness is just not letting the jerks get you down.
Another reason I'm feeling positive about life: my box of Fitness Clusters breakfast cereal has a picture of a bad ass looking squirrel on it, and his eyes are narrowed in a very threatening manner....oh, and he's wearing giant boxing gloves . Below the picture it says: "DU VS. HORNCHEN- Fight for your Fruhstuck!" German food packaging often includes a bizarre mix of German and English words, this box of cereal being no exception. It means "You vs. Squirrel: fight for your breakfast!" I've been eating this cereal every morning for a week straight, just so I can chortle at that picture when I stumble into the dark kitchen at an ungodly hour of the day. I've eaten all the cereal now, but I saved the box so that once I get around to charging my camera battery, I can take a picture of the fightin' Sciuridae. (According to Websters Dictionary, this is the particular branch of the rodent family that squirrels belong to.)
I think I may have exhausted all topics of any sort of interest. Oh no, one more.
I watched a FANTASTIC movie on Friday night- Inglourious Basterds. I have to admit, I'm not a huge Tarantino fan. I generally dislike gratuitous violence, and his films tend to contain a lot of it. I found that this one only had minimal amounts though, which made it much more enjoyable, in my humble opinion. I loved the way all the different elements of the plot came together in the end, and I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. I also really got a kick out of being able to understand a lot of the German WITHOUT the assitance of subtitles. Ok, I might have peeked at a few of them, but I understood a lot of it- not too bad for the ol' ego. The icing on the cake was definitely Brad Pitt's accent, as well as the incredibly short appearance by Mike Meyers as a British officer. I've never understood people's obsession with Tarantino, but if all his movies were as fantastic as this one, I think I'd jump on that bandwagon pretty quickly.
I'll post a few pictures below, of recent happenings- just in case anyone reads this and doesn't have Facebook. Haha, look at me, acting as if I have a devoted readership. I do know how to make a joke. And with that, I'm out like an irish stout. Report cards, here I come! (Maybe.)
Katy came to visit! We had a great time, and I introduced her to Dresden's finest Weissbier.
My friend Chris had a slammin' Halloween party. Anne was a vampire (they're so hot right now), and I was Pippi Longstocking....I have trouble coming up with costumes.
I t think Pippi drank one too many G&T's.
My friend Lyn didn't want her fetus to miss out on the fun.
Ok, so this photograph is not recent at all, but I just found it and think it's hilarious. My sister Bridget and I are CLASSY brauds.
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