My current mood is foul. This is due solely and completely to my total lack of sleep last night. I blame this whole "time zone" tom foolery for messing up my body clock. Not that it's exactly a well oiled machine normally, but it's not this messed up most of the time.
Given that my mood is so foul, I've decided to create a list.
Things that really make me want to punch a baby:
1. Insomnia.
2. Expensive boots that start to leak due to a sole malfunction mere weeks after purchase.
3. Feet upon feet of snow. This would probably not be on the list if it weren't for item number 2.
4. Idiotic BLOG SPELL CHECK that tells me I don't know how to spell WEREN'T. I know how to correctly spell simple contractions, OK BLOG SPELL CHECK!?
5. The fact that I speak to inanimate objects.
6. Herds of clueless jokers who get off the tram and then form a pod standing RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SIDEWALK, which has been narrowed considerably by the huge snowbanks piled up on both sides.
7. Said herds of clueless jokers refusing to move out of the way when an enraged looking individual (such as myself) says "ENTSCHULDIGUNG" (excuse me) in a very dragon like voice while charging down the ice-encrusted sidewalk.
8. Almost burning my sad but satisfying dinner of canned chili.
Things that make me feel like patting a baby on it's cute, soft little head:
1. SAVING my canned chili from the fiery bowels of the pot bottom just in the nick of time.
2. Going to bed at 7 PM.
Yikes, folks. It's been a long day. I'm out like an Irish stout.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Sunday, January 4, 2009
There and back again.
I hope everyone enjoyed my Lord of the Rings ripoff title. Sometimes, no matter how hard I try, I just can't keep the nerdiness in and it bursts forth in an uncontrollable act or sentence...much like the one when I typed in that title.
Well, I did go there and back again. My journey wasn't quite as epic as Sam and Frodo's (I said Sam first because I always thought he was the coolest of the Hobbits, and under appreciated), but it was highly enjoyable. I took off for Oregon on the 18th of December, and arrived in Portland to the hugest and longest running snowstorm that we've had in probably fifteen years. It was fun for a couple of days, and then I got really sick of not being able to go anywhere because all the roads were a disaster. Even public transportation failed me- after abandoning hope of driving from my parents home in Salem to Portland, I decided to invest in a ticket for a trusty old Greyhound bus. Well, turns out Greyhound ISN'T so trusty....I arrived at the bus station ready to go, and was informed that all buses had been cancelled. Well, this was just total balls, that's the only appropriate way to describe the situation. So, I ended up staying in Salem, only leaving the house twice, for about a week. Yikes. It was actually pretty fun to have that much time with my family, who are a wonderful bunch of people, but I was hoping to see more of my friends as well during that time. THEN, the weather finally cleared up enough on Christmas day for us to make the trek up to the Portland area to go the traditional family Christmas at my Grandpa's. After leaving pretty late in the day because my sister decided to start a labor intensive cake at about 2 PM (don't worry Katy, I love you and it was a delicious cake. And it was funny when it boiled over in the oven), we were on our way. Various aunts and uncles started calling our various cell phones wondering where the hell we were, and we assured them that we would be there within the hour. They would wait dinner for us, we were assured.
Well, it turns out waiting dinner for us didn't include waiting for us to sort out a flat tire. That's right, about halfway there, we all heard a rather alarming and extremely loud popping noise, followed by the ever so pleasant smell of burning rubber. My dad steered the family vehicle we lovingly refer to as the conestoga wagon off the freeway, and into a gas station. Turns out, we'd driven over something sharp that had COMPLETELY shredded the tire. And of course, the parking lot was a snowy wasteland and it was cold enough to freeze the quills off a porcupine. (I just made that saying up. I like it.) After about an hour and a half of work, my dad and brother (who very fortunately happens to be in the resourceful/be prepared line of work) managed to get the tire changed. By this point, family dinner was a mere distant memory, and we all decided it was just best to turn around and head back to Salem. Not having much to eat at the house, having planned on feasting at my Grandpa's and all, our dinner options were limited. I was so annoyed with the situation that I started throwing out some outrageous promises, such as "If we have to turn around and go all the way back home, I'm buying everyone dinner!!" Well, I was cursing my own rash words when we actually DID turn around and go all the way back home. It being Christmas and all though, most restaurants were closed. We ended up finding a Chinese joint that did take out, and deciding not to be a total Scrooge, I sprang for that. It really was very Christmas Story-esque. My brother went out to retrieve the food, and after he brought it back, we ate Chinese, watched the Blazers game, and had a very enjoyable evening. It probably turned out much more relaxing than having dinner with grumpy relatives (grumpy due to our tardiness) would have been.
Other than that, it was a fairly uneventful but lovely trip. I did some great shopping for American items I've missed. I got to see some of my MOST favorite people, including Dave, Emily, Chelsea, Anna, Jeff, Amanda, Megan, and Andy. They were wonderful and great fun to spend time with. I especially enjoyed my New Years eve shenanigans with Anna and Jeff, ESPECIALLY because I got a kiss from Jeff (it was super hot) and THEN got to sleep with Anna. Also super hot.
Now, I am back here in Dresden, on an extremely messed up sleep schedule. This would account for my blogging (that word is really stupid, I don't know why I used it) at midnight, when I have to get up at 6 AM and be a bright and happy teacher again tomorrow morning. Oy vey!
Oh, and as fate would have it, after having it dump snow the whole time I was in Oregon, the land of very little snow (normally), I've returned to have it dump snow in Dresden. It would seem that a girl just can't get a break.
I'll end on that note. Let's hope my new coat proves up to the inclement weather challenge.
Well, I did go there and back again. My journey wasn't quite as epic as Sam and Frodo's (I said Sam first because I always thought he was the coolest of the Hobbits, and under appreciated), but it was highly enjoyable. I took off for Oregon on the 18th of December, and arrived in Portland to the hugest and longest running snowstorm that we've had in probably fifteen years. It was fun for a couple of days, and then I got really sick of not being able to go anywhere because all the roads were a disaster. Even public transportation failed me- after abandoning hope of driving from my parents home in Salem to Portland, I decided to invest in a ticket for a trusty old Greyhound bus. Well, turns out Greyhound ISN'T so trusty....I arrived at the bus station ready to go, and was informed that all buses had been cancelled. Well, this was just total balls, that's the only appropriate way to describe the situation. So, I ended up staying in Salem, only leaving the house twice, for about a week. Yikes. It was actually pretty fun to have that much time with my family, who are a wonderful bunch of people, but I was hoping to see more of my friends as well during that time. THEN, the weather finally cleared up enough on Christmas day for us to make the trek up to the Portland area to go the traditional family Christmas at my Grandpa's. After leaving pretty late in the day because my sister decided to start a labor intensive cake at about 2 PM (don't worry Katy, I love you and it was a delicious cake. And it was funny when it boiled over in the oven), we were on our way. Various aunts and uncles started calling our various cell phones wondering where the hell we were, and we assured them that we would be there within the hour. They would wait dinner for us, we were assured.
Well, it turns out waiting dinner for us didn't include waiting for us to sort out a flat tire. That's right, about halfway there, we all heard a rather alarming and extremely loud popping noise, followed by the ever so pleasant smell of burning rubber. My dad steered the family vehicle we lovingly refer to as the conestoga wagon off the freeway, and into a gas station. Turns out, we'd driven over something sharp that had COMPLETELY shredded the tire. And of course, the parking lot was a snowy wasteland and it was cold enough to freeze the quills off a porcupine. (I just made that saying up. I like it.) After about an hour and a half of work, my dad and brother (who very fortunately happens to be in the resourceful/be prepared line of work) managed to get the tire changed. By this point, family dinner was a mere distant memory, and we all decided it was just best to turn around and head back to Salem. Not having much to eat at the house, having planned on feasting at my Grandpa's and all, our dinner options were limited. I was so annoyed with the situation that I started throwing out some outrageous promises, such as "If we have to turn around and go all the way back home, I'm buying everyone dinner!!" Well, I was cursing my own rash words when we actually DID turn around and go all the way back home. It being Christmas and all though, most restaurants were closed. We ended up finding a Chinese joint that did take out, and deciding not to be a total Scrooge, I sprang for that. It really was very Christmas Story-esque. My brother went out to retrieve the food, and after he brought it back, we ate Chinese, watched the Blazers game, and had a very enjoyable evening. It probably turned out much more relaxing than having dinner with grumpy relatives (grumpy due to our tardiness) would have been.
Other than that, it was a fairly uneventful but lovely trip. I did some great shopping for American items I've missed. I got to see some of my MOST favorite people, including Dave, Emily, Chelsea, Anna, Jeff, Amanda, Megan, and Andy. They were wonderful and great fun to spend time with. I especially enjoyed my New Years eve shenanigans with Anna and Jeff, ESPECIALLY because I got a kiss from Jeff (it was super hot) and THEN got to sleep with Anna. Also super hot.
Now, I am back here in Dresden, on an extremely messed up sleep schedule. This would account for my blogging (that word is really stupid, I don't know why I used it) at midnight, when I have to get up at 6 AM and be a bright and happy teacher again tomorrow morning. Oy vey!
Oh, and as fate would have it, after having it dump snow the whole time I was in Oregon, the land of very little snow (normally), I've returned to have it dump snow in Dresden. It would seem that a girl just can't get a break.
I'll end on that note. Let's hope my new coat proves up to the inclement weather challenge.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Avoidance Tactic
Two posts in one day, WHAAA?
I just did a huge pile of laundry, and now it is sitting in a wet, wrinkled heap, waiting to be hung up. A real dryer that actually DRIES one's clothing, rather than just heating it up into a steaming pile of fabric, does not seem to exist in this country. Exaggeration? Perhaps. Does that make it any less annoying? Definitely not.
To avoid hanging up every piece of clothing I own, including my SOCKS, (what kind of a freak hangs up their socks?!) I am doing this. I just bought a huge rug for my living room, as well as a coffee table that I built (well, assembled might be a more appropriate word) myself, and so I am enjoying just sitting in my living room and taking it all in while I type.
I really don't have all that much to say, except that it's cold as balls and still snowing. I also am wishing that I had a television, because I'm definitely in the mood for some sort of TV on DVD marathon. Curses, foiled again. I have a TV stand that I bought from someone who was moving, back in July when I was sure I would get a TV as soon as I moved into my apartment. Ahhh, those days of naivete, before I experienced the trials and tribulations (and public humiliation) of trying to lug something heavy back home on the tram. Unless I am able to find one of those red wagons that kids ride around in, or someone loans me a vehicle, I won't be owning a TV for awhile. No way am I bringing something like that home via public transportation. I suppose a taxi is always an option, but I seem to have very poor luck whenever I try to call for one of those. All of this is really just a sign from the big guns upstairs that I shouldn't be watching TV, since I could be doing so many more constructive things with my time.
I think I will post some pictures, of one of our latest social outings. Any and all social outings in Germany involve alcohol and sausages, and I believe both of these make an appearance in the following fotos (I definitely typed it that way- the German way- accidentally at first. I decided not to correct it because I feel it is a good example of how muddled my brain has become in it's sad, sad attempt to be billingual.)
These photos capture me drinking hot spiced wine, singing karaoke, and getting up to some general debauchery at the Dresden "Winterdorf." For you non-Deutsch sprachers, that's the winter village. It's a classy place, let me tell you. Weiners for miles.
And with that, I'm spent.
A whole crew of teachers from Dresden Int. School
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
You Positively REEK of Awesomeness.
Before I do any sort of real update, I feel it necessary to acknowledge my dear and faithful friends who actually take time to read this rubbish. I actually started to write an entry singing each of their praises, but when I read it over again, it was just about the most ridiculously corny thing I've ever laid eyes on.
I think you all would have gagged a little upon reading it, despite the good intent. So I will just do the free association thing and write a phrase that pops into my head to describe
each of these amazing individuals.
Krystyn Ourada, above right-and this is reaching way back into the annals of time, I hope she remembers-: (Spoken to a llama) "You wanna go?!"
Courtney Ashford, above left: Me: "Hey is Courtney there?"
Rod Ashford: "No."
Me:"Who the F**CK IS THIS?!!?"
(At four in the morning.)
My dear Anna Walters: "Who wants treatsies?" and "I've made a horrible mistake."
(Or anything Dan Savage related.)
Katy Caldwell, younger sister of epic proportions: "Doggy Monster."
Sorry Katy I just had to do it.
I have to preface my good friend Jeff Hammond's free association phrase with a sad, sad fact: I do not have in my possession any photographs of the two of us together. Tragedy strikes again.
Ok, here is Jeff's: "I can't focus on anything you're saying with your boobs hanging out like that."
Ah, how I love and miss you all! I hope you've enjoyed this little free association game. I know I have. I've also enjoyed the chance to hone my drag and drop skills- they were a little shaky prior to this post.
Truly wonderful people like these are what make life worth living.
And if you are crying to yourself that I didn't mention you, then maybe you should holler at yo' girl every once in awhile.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Oh, how I adore the weekend
Well, dear readers, I am updating again. I feel a bi-weekly update isn't too shabby, considering the facts that a) I have been working my ass off and b) I've been sick. Yes, I somehow picked up an extremely violent strain of a stomach virus that has been going around (apparently). Last night I ate for the first time since last Friday. Ok, I've eaten crackers and on one occasion, mashed potatoes, but that's been it. Nothing else would stay in my stomach, and it was not a happy time. I will spare everyone the gory details, but let's just say that whatever went into my stomach came right back out again. Blech.
But, I am cured! Or so it seems, I don't want to get my hopes up too high only to have them dashed after these frosted mini wheats finish digesting. Now that I am feeling better, I have to start cleaning my apartment. Since school started I have just been letting everything pile up, and haven't really been doing this whole cleaning thing. My kitchen is disgusting, and the floors are absolutely filthy. I don't know how they get so dirty but....they do. Additionally, I REALLY need to do laundry, but do I have the stupid tokens to use the laundry machine in the basement of my apartment building? Well, of course I don't. Have I tried on several occasions to acquire said tokens? Well, of course I have. I seem to have a landlord that is never at his office. Either that or he has a policy of not answering the buzzer for people without an appointment. To tell the truth, I don't really care about seeing anyone....if they could just toss some tokens down to me from the upstairs windows I would be happy as a clam at high tide.
Owing to my current lack of tokens (I feel like I am eight years old and back at that one pizza parlor in Salem that had the really awesome games you couldn't put real money into, only tokens), I have to go to a stupid laundromat and try and do my laundry there. Or I might go to one of my co-workers homes to take advantage of their laundry machines which they have IN THEIR APARTMENTS. I suppose I could spring the four hundred euros and buy my own, but it's much more fun (and much cheaper) to just bitch about not having one. Also, buying something of that size would require coordinating the delivery of said machine, and things like that just give me a headache. Because the exchange would invariably be conducted in either broken German (on my part) or broken English (on their part) and I would most likely miss some vital piece of information. You know, something like "you have to pay us 500 euros upon delivery." It seems that I have a lot to bitch about today....eh well, so be it. I feel this is a fairly tame way of dealing with the annoyances in my life.
The second week of school went much better than the first, I have to say. I was a bit downtrodden at the end of last week, and was wondering just what I had gotten myself into. It was definitely not all sunshine, bunnies, and lollipops, but it was better. I didn't want to cry and/or break something at the end of the day yesterday, so I'll take it. I am really starting to understand though, why teachers get so many breaks. Because they NEED them.
I do have some hilarious kids though, and they keep me going. I mentioned the Portland Trailblazers in class yesterday, and after explaining who they were, I was attacked for details, photos, and memorabilia. I didn't want to tell the kids that I wasn't the biggest sports fan to begin with, so I just said I would try and find some Blazers stuff to bring in. Who knew the Blazers would ever make anyone so popular?
I am hoping to go to Prague next weekend. I need a little pick me up. Hopefully it will work out, and maybe someone fun and interesting from work will want to go with me. Not that I am averse to traveling alone, but I do enjoy company.
Also, I have to admit, that I am homesick. I keep thinking about what I would be doing if I were in Portland right now, and then I think about what I was doing last year at this time and how awesome and easy life was. I would give just about anything to be able to sit on the porch of the Farmhouse, eat some cool whip, and drink a beer with my pals.
Or I wish I could just transport all my favorite people here. That would be an acceptable solution.
In other news, my best friend just completed her first TRIATHALON. And it wasn't one of those pansy ass mini triathalons, it was the real one. And the biggest triathalon in the world, no less. She is pretty much a bad ass. This is her crossing the finish line.
AND my little sister started COLLEGE last weekend. Balls, I am getting old.
But, I am cured! Or so it seems, I don't want to get my hopes up too high only to have them dashed after these frosted mini wheats finish digesting. Now that I am feeling better, I have to start cleaning my apartment. Since school started I have just been letting everything pile up, and haven't really been doing this whole cleaning thing. My kitchen is disgusting, and the floors are absolutely filthy. I don't know how they get so dirty but....they do. Additionally, I REALLY need to do laundry, but do I have the stupid tokens to use the laundry machine in the basement of my apartment building? Well, of course I don't. Have I tried on several occasions to acquire said tokens? Well, of course I have. I seem to have a landlord that is never at his office. Either that or he has a policy of not answering the buzzer for people without an appointment. To tell the truth, I don't really care about seeing anyone....if they could just toss some tokens down to me from the upstairs windows I would be happy as a clam at high tide.
Owing to my current lack of tokens (I feel like I am eight years old and back at that one pizza parlor in Salem that had the really awesome games you couldn't put real money into, only tokens), I have to go to a stupid laundromat and try and do my laundry there. Or I might go to one of my co-workers homes to take advantage of their laundry machines which they have IN THEIR APARTMENTS. I suppose I could spring the four hundred euros and buy my own, but it's much more fun (and much cheaper) to just bitch about not having one. Also, buying something of that size would require coordinating the delivery of said machine, and things like that just give me a headache. Because the exchange would invariably be conducted in either broken German (on my part) or broken English (on their part) and I would most likely miss some vital piece of information. You know, something like "you have to pay us 500 euros upon delivery." It seems that I have a lot to bitch about today....eh well, so be it. I feel this is a fairly tame way of dealing with the annoyances in my life.
The second week of school went much better than the first, I have to say. I was a bit downtrodden at the end of last week, and was wondering just what I had gotten myself into. It was definitely not all sunshine, bunnies, and lollipops, but it was better. I didn't want to cry and/or break something at the end of the day yesterday, so I'll take it. I am really starting to understand though, why teachers get so many breaks. Because they NEED them.
I do have some hilarious kids though, and they keep me going. I mentioned the Portland Trailblazers in class yesterday, and after explaining who they were, I was attacked for details, photos, and memorabilia. I didn't want to tell the kids that I wasn't the biggest sports fan to begin with, so I just said I would try and find some Blazers stuff to bring in. Who knew the Blazers would ever make anyone so popular?
I am hoping to go to Prague next weekend. I need a little pick me up. Hopefully it will work out, and maybe someone fun and interesting from work will want to go with me. Not that I am averse to traveling alone, but I do enjoy company.
Also, I have to admit, that I am homesick. I keep thinking about what I would be doing if I were in Portland right now, and then I think about what I was doing last year at this time and how awesome and easy life was. I would give just about anything to be able to sit on the porch of the Farmhouse, eat some cool whip, and drink a beer with my pals.
Or I wish I could just transport all my favorite people here. That would be an acceptable solution.
In other news, my best friend just completed her first TRIATHALON. And it wasn't one of those pansy ass mini triathalons, it was the real one. And the biggest triathalon in the world, no less. She is pretty much a bad ass. This is her crossing the finish line.
AND my little sister started COLLEGE last weekend. Balls, I am getting old.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Grapes in various forms
I forgot to mention this in the previous post, and it is EXTREMELY important. Today after school, at the first real staff meeting of the year, we were served WINE by our PRINCIPAL.
I feel I need say no more on the subject. All readers should be duly impressed.
Speaking of grapes, I am so effing annoyed that you can't get seedless grapes here. Some of you know of my (so called) strange eating habits. Well, I feel compelled to mention here that these mother effing stupid idiotic seed filled grapes make my favorite breakfast of cottage cheese and grapes IMPOSSIBLE. There is no way to spit seed out around a mouthful of cottage cheese.
German seedy graped bastards.
I feel I need say no more on the subject. All readers should be duly impressed.
Speaking of grapes, I am so effing annoyed that you can't get seedless grapes here. Some of you know of my (so called) strange eating habits. Well, I feel compelled to mention here that these mother effing stupid idiotic seed filled grapes make my favorite breakfast of cottage cheese and grapes IMPOSSIBLE. There is no way to spit seed out around a mouthful of cottage cheese.
German seedy graped bastards.
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